The Slowest Blogger on the Net

I know, I drop the ball and forget to post for long stretches. But, my friends, this post will catch you up on everything. BTW, I *hate* the way John McCain always says "my friends." In an attempt to overuse the phrase so much that he can't use it anymore, I will punctuate this post with that annoying catchphrase. Fun for you!!

So, my friends, the last time I posted Josie was starting preschool and Kieran was kind of sleeping. I can proudly report, my friends, that Kieran is sleeping like a CHAMP or un champinion as they say in Spanish. (mushrooms sleep *really* well). He's up to about 12 hours a night, very regularly. And we haven't had to resort to driving him around to get him to go to sleep. As a great man named Kevin once said, Giddyup. (that was a test to see if any UVA folks are reading this blog. I doubt it.) Those of you planning on having babies, invest in a machine we call the baby beat box, commercially marketed as Baby Plus. It's dopey, people will make fun of you, and you will feel like a goofball, but, my friends, it works. For reals.

Now for Josie. She has a number of accomplishments under her belt, including going both pee and poop in the potty nearly every time, walking up and down the stairs on her own, and sleeping in a big girl bed. However, my friends, she has been doing some other big girl stuff that is not so great. For example, she literally threw herself on the floor, screaming and crying, at Target in the shoe aisles the other day. (You caught me. I buy my shoes at Target. My friends, you know that all top notch professionals buy their footwear at discount stores. Don't hate the player, hate the game.) There is just something about that store that makes kids totally on edge. Maybe it's all of the red, maybe it's the low prices accompanied by high style. Whatever it is, my friends, perhaps you should take along some sedatives the next time you take a kid in that store. They just can't handle it unmedicated.

I have had the kids on my own for three days. ALL on MY OWN. Go me. For reals. Many doubted that I could handle this, my friends, but I have proven them wrong. I can totally do it. Pioneer women would be super impressed by me, what with taking care of two small children for three full days, with my washing machine, dishwasher, seemingly unlimited supply of clothes, numerous local entertainment venues and a car to drive around in. When you think about it, my friends, it's pretty darn amazing what I accomplished. I think Cory should send me to the spa for the rest of the week.

I have no photos because our camera is broken. Fuji was kind enough to fix it and send it back to us. Some minor problem involving sand in the zoom lens. A small piece of advice, my friends, next time you go to the beach, leave your delicate digital camera at home.

If anyone has talked to either Cory or myself in the last few weeks/months, you know that a) we are *obsessed* with politics; b) I have found a new target for all of my anger and unhelpful feelings in the person of Sarah Palin; and c) if given the chance, Cory might just leave me for Campbell Brown. Okay, if you've talked to us you know that's not true. Cory would DEFINITELY leave me for Campbell Brown if given the chance. My friends, I'm going to be volunteering for the No on 8 Campaign this weekend. If you have any doubts about voting against this attempt to insert discrimination into the California constitution, please give me a chance to sway you. I have limited persuasive powers, my friends, but I'd like the chance. It's super important. For reals, for reals.

I'm also living in total fear/hope/fear about Obama possibly winning. It's hard for me to believe again that the Democrats can actually win when it's important (see, e.g., Gore, Kerry) but we might just do it. I get kind of freaked out with excitement thinking about him standing on the steps of the Capitol with that awesomely smart and sassy wife of his (I have a soft spot for smart sassy women, my friends) and their two adorable children taking the oath of office. Whether he can get anything done or not, my friends, remains to be seen, but I think that just him winning will be a huge step forward for all of us. For reals.

First Day of (Pre)School!

Hard for us to believe but Josie set out on her first day of Preschool this morning. She's going to this fancy-pants liberal indoctrination center selected by her father. It's awesome. Really, though, it's a very nice school. Kieran slept through the whole thing.

Josie is asserting more and more independence these days and seeming so grown up. On the playground the other day, she climbed into this (very low) treehouse and said "mama, wanna come hang out with me?" She also says about pretty much every task "NOOOOOOOO!!! Let ME DO IT!!!!" which is so aggravating because a) no one likes to hear kids scream sentences/demands with the word MEEEE in it and b) she takes for freaking ever to do stuff. But I guess that's part of the process of growing up - I have to learn to be more patient. :) She also tries to negotiate. In the bathtub, at the park, anywhere fun: "two more minutes!" Before bed: "one more book??! one more song??" I think I even heard her ask for a glass of water last night. It's like they have these excuses hardwired into their brains - it's not like we have ever given or offered her a glass of water at bedtime, so I have no idea where she came up with that one. By the time Kieran is sleeping on his own (see below) Josie will require 2 hours of my time to get to sleep. Oy!

I took a couple of photos of the (non) event and they're below. BTW, how cute is dad in his plaid shirt?

In Kieran news, he slept from 10:30 p.m. to 6:30 a.m. without making a peep!!! I still woke up every few hours to see if he was breathing - its very unnerving when they sleep quietly for long stretches. Usually he grunts quite a bit in his sleep so it's easy to know he's alive. It's probably a lot like having an ogre live in your house. At any rate, the sleep was good, even though it took from about 8:30 to 10:30 to get him to go to sleep. I think he was all riled up after watching that bonehead Fred Thompson and that doofus Joe Lieberman speak last night. What is wrong with these people?!?! And those "country first" signs?? What does that even mean?? They get me so angry with their idiotic slogans and just the whole mindset. It's ridiculous. Perhaps that's why Kieran couldn't get to sleep, despite the rocking, eating, pacifier, and 40 minute walk in the cool night air.

One Month!

Hard to believe he's been here a month - although sometimes the days seem like weeks....

A few more photos. We've been spending lots of time with Nana and Pop Pop and Nana Carol just came in from Minnesota a few days ago, so Kieran has been spending lots of time throwing up on I mean getting to know his grandparents. He is starting to show some signs of personality and his eyes are a beautiful steely blue. Josie has also been basking in the grand-parental attention. In this photo, you can nearly see the smirk he inherited from Pop Pop:

Kieran Arrives

Well after complaining non-stop about being sick to death of being pregnant, and eating one *really* spicy lunch, Kieran finally arrived on Wednesday, July 16th at 1:59 a.m. after about 30 hours of labor. They have lots of good drugs at the hospital though, so I can't complain. The entire time I was in the hospital I thought about women who gave birth a) ears and years ago; and b) with no access to fantastic maternal care in this country and others who did/do not have such awesome inventions as perineal ice packs and percocet. We came home on Friday morning and Josie has been very excited to spend time with baby brother. Some photos of Kieran's first few days:

The Big 2

Josie is 2! Hard to believe. She had a lovely birthday party with the California family and the Minnesota family briefly by phone. A video of Josie begging for birthday cake, although you have to listen closely ("Want some birthday cake!!"). You can see she is her mother's daughter the way she puts away a *huge* piece of cake.

Josie, these are not appropriate role models

Josie had her first trip to Disneyland. Cousin Emma is *obsessed* with "Princesses" which is the word that they use to describe all manner of female heroines from Disney movies nowadays. If you wait like 2 and a half hours you get to go in and have some one-on-one time to sit and chat with the "Princesses" (today, Cinderella and Jasmine - maybe both of them were actually Princesses, now that I think about it...).







I hate to be totally predictable here, but objectively speaking, these are not the women that I want Josie to look up to. I mean, when they sit and chat about the strategy involved in becoming a "Princess" (assuming that one can become a non-quotation-marks Princess only through birth or marriage, we'll leave that one aside), I would imagine it's like "sing well, be sweet (and just a little stupid), have huge eyes and a tiny waist" and that is the entire plan. So neither the ends nor the means are really something that Josie needs to aspire to.







However, the women who are actually in the costumes in these photos might actually be good role models. These are young women who have to wear a crap load of makeup, wear ridiculous outfits (Jasmine has a really raw deal) for hours and hours and be sweet and patient and kind to little children all day. Children who have waited two hours in line (which must seem like WEEKS when you're three) just to see you. Children who, at times, are probably not very nice. And they're probably working their way towards a degree in education from Cal State Fullerton or something.







I'll be sure to explain all of this to Josie tomorrow.







For now, PHOTOS!

Thar She Blows!!

Breakfast ABCs

So this is the first time we've videoed Josie since like her birthday last year or something, but I figured out how to get the video onto the computer and how to get the video from the computer to the blog. Well maybe I figured it out. Is it here?

Eddie Vedder Agrees: Josie is Cute

This morning Cory decided to pop into a music store in Carlsbad this morning with Josie in tow. Also shopping for new music: Eddie Vedder. Cory being the swift thinking fellow that he is, asked Mr. Vedder to sign a copy of Eddie's soundtrack from Into the Wild.

Cory: "Excuse me, would you mind signing this?"
Eddie: "Sure, no problem. Cute kid."
Cory: "Thanks!"
Eddie: "No problem" (walking out the door)
Cory: (to Josie) "Say bye to Eddie"
Josie: "Bye Andy!!"

Celebrities take note: Josie is unimpressed.

Josie + One = Ack!

So the big news which I'm sure you've heard from us directly (if not - guess what!! :) is that we have a baby on the way, due to arrive mid- to late-July. They say it's a boy. We've tried to explain to Josie about the baby, that she'll have to share our love with her new baby brother, that she will no longer be the only apple of our eye, that she'll probably get less attention and will likely have to give up a number of toys as well as her personal space, but she hasn't seemed to catch on yet. She does get that there is a baby in my belly - she points at my (large) belly and says "Baby!" But she also points at Daddy's (not as large) belly and says "Baby," at Pop-pop's concave belly and says "Belly," and even her own belly and says "Baby!"

She does like to give my tummy kisses. She's very sweet. I think she's going to be a great big sister.

Photos!

My Girl Likes To Potty All The Time

It's been forever and I have way too many cute Josie stores.

First, per the title, the most exciting news - Josie is figuring out the whole potty thing. It started out rough - we bought her a little potty seat thing which she quickly became totally enamored with - but she REFUSED to get off of it. She wanted to have a naked rear all day and just get on and off the potty as she felt the whim. Not the "urge" mind you - she never actually used the potty, but she was insistent on a) being naked and b) having free reign to get on and off. When Cory (quite reasonably) insisted on a diaper, the girl just totally freaked out and pitched a huge fit. What a weirdo!!! Anyway, this morning brought a huge victory as she said "potty poo poo" and I put her on the potty and she smiled and kicked her feet and I coached her on with phrases I will not repeat lest I really hit mama-rock-bottom-embarrassment-that-I'm-even-talking-about-this. I picked her up and there was no poo but some pee! Yay!!!!

It's just astonishing that I find this exciting. But this is really like the most exciting thing going on in my life. Tell me that is not a depressing commentary on the state of my life.

Anyway, Josie story number two (no pun intended) is really funny and you will like it more than the first, which was quite frankly, fairly boring/gross. Okay, so Josie likes to say "hola!" to people really loud. We've been trying to teach her Spanish here and there and hola just seems to have stuck. So she's at the drugstore with Cory waiting in line for a prescription. And saying hi to everyone. And she'll say hi to people (strangers) in stores and such at a louder pitch and more frequent intervals until the person relents and says hello back. So she's saying hi to everyone, and everyone is saying hi back to her. This teenage boy is listening to his iPod, trying to pretend he's invisible - which of course Josie is having none of. She says hi. No response. Hi again, louder. No response. Again. Same. She scrunches her face and then says really loud, "HOLA!" The boy looks up and finally figures out that she's been yelling HI at him, then replies to her "Hola." Josie is happy. Everyone gets prescriptions, takes care of things. Cory is on his way out and Josie is, of course, saying Bye! to everyone. Except the boy. To him, she says "ADIOS!!" And he laughed and said Adios right back. So the key to communicating with your sullen teen, people of the world, is apparently as simple as just speaking Spanish.

I am going to post super cute photos as soon as I can get my computer working right.

One more!

She's not smiling in a bunch of the photos I put up. No good! She smiles like crazy, I promise!!

Long Time Gone

Dude, so it's been forever. We had Thanksgiving in Orange County, then Christmas (1) in Minnesota for a week with Cory's family, then Christmas (2)/New Years/Mom's Birthday in OC again this weekend plus. We're pretty tired. Traveling over the holidays with an 18 month old is a nightmare. Plus everyone at Cory's family's house got the stomach flu, including Josie, Cory and I. Disaster! Holidays were lovely anyway though.

It snowed like crazy in Minnesota, affording yet another photo opportunity (now that we have a new camera!). Josie didn't really like being in the snow, but she was ok being pulled around on a sled by her Nana. She's in love with a guy named Arthur, who is currently Cory's sister's boyfriend, but maybe in 20 years or so Josie will get her wish. We left days ago and she keeps saying Arthur, Arthur. Remember in that long western epic movie with the three brothers and Anthony Hopkins is the dad (what is the name of that movie??) where the young native girl was in love with Brad Pitt and it was like "uh, yeah, no" and then she grew up and they got married and it seemed totally fine? I think Josie has that story in mind.

Okay so photos.